To My Future Wife that Wasn't

We've been married now twenty years my love.

We fit like hand in glove.

You wear the pants in this house.

You know you married a mouse.

I was so nervous when we went on our first date.

That's why I was thirty minutes late.

I couldn't stop my nerves from shaking.

I couldn't stop my heart from aching.

You were so charming and beautiful.

When I dropped you off that night, you said 'Tootles."

How odd and wonderful that sounded to me.

I knew right there and then our love had to be.

Now it's twenty years gone by.

You're still the apple of my eye.

Your beauty has not faded one iota.

Of good looks, you have more than your quota.

I'm a man who's still smitten.

Your raven hair, eyes like a kitten's.

Your sexy walk, the way you sigh

When I put my hand upon your thigh.

Oh love of my life, I'm so glad you're my wife..

The first two verses were part truth, part fiction.
You know I have a predilection
For the fantastic and unreal.
Don't know how to tell you how I feel.
Darling how do I say in verse
That I never ever felt worse
Than that night I didn't kiss you. 
That you're my whole universe?
Well no, that's not true.
But how do I tell you what I never did then?
What was it made me hesitate?
My insecurity and self-hate.
God I know it's too late!

My love for you then has certainly cooled.
And I know that I am the biggest fool
To write to you in the present
And in a future that wasn't.
My thoughts are as disheveled as these words.
And I know that it's absurd
To make art out of a missed chance.
A lonely victim of circumstance.
Guess I'll pour myself another drink
And try not to think about the one that got away.