If I could talk with the animals

Elephants have the best sense of humor.

Their ears are so big cause they don't want to miss any jokes.

They find it hilarious when they sit on your car.

You just don't know what their laugh sounds like.

Monkeys like to throw poo.

Watch out they don't throw it at you.

They think humans take themselves too seriously.

I think they're on to something.

The raccoon doesn't know he's scum. 

He just finds beauty in everything

That is discarded and abandoned.

There is wisdom in that.

Rhinoceros think you're ugly

Where is your proud horn?

You look like a fool and a wimp.

The rhinoceros is a pimp!

The deer have such grace.

Why do you smear their blood on your face

To show you conquered them

With your lethal weapon?

The skunk has got the funk.

He's pretty and he's charming.

Why do you find him so alarming?

Think your shit don't stink?

I've never met an opossum.

I don't even know how to spell it.

But I'll bet even he has charisma.

Ok, he's kind of an enigma.

Lions are the kings and queens of the jungle.

Their majesty is indisputable.

They protect their own in their personal zone.

We could learn a lot from them.

A turtle is not the fastest animal.

But they're so cool and gentle.

And they have great navigation.

Don't flush em down for sanitation.