Black Valentine

For Valentines Day I'm gonna buy myself a dozen black roses.

Then cut my fingers on the thorns.

I'm gonna buy a box of fancy chocolates.

Then melt em all down.

I'm gonna find myself a sweet serene dove.

Then impale it on an ice pick.

If the moon is for lovers,

Then the sun's eclipse is for me.

Instead of toasting my love with champagne,

I'll drink some Drano with a bleach chaser.

At my wedding they'll throw nails instead of rice.

I wanna crucify Cupid on a cross,

Then set him on fire.

The words 'I love you'

I will reserve for myself alone.

Stupid words for a stupid custom.

I'm never Happy on Valentine's Day.